Heartbreaking

I experienced something today that I've never experienced before.

I've been a mom for almost 6 years now. The range of emotions that come with that title is huge, but today was groundbreaking. I hope Daxton doesn't hate me for writing this down, as I don't do it to embarrass him, only to record my own feelings about it because they were so intense.

We were at Daxton's soccer game today. It was a rough game. His team has been undefeated this season, but they had finally met their match. Daxton was working on keeping the ball out of the opposing team's goal (they don't have goalies at this age), when he crashed with a couple of other kids. I must have blinked because I don't know exactly how it happened, but the next thing I saw was a flash of red. Daxton was laying on the ground, along with the other boys, and his black soccer shorts had come down to expose his red underpants. Let me stop for a minute to explain that Daxton is INTENSELY modest. He doesn't want anyone outside the immediate family to see his bare chest or him in his underwear. I knew this was not going to be good. I immediately felt his embarrassment and my heart began to break. He jumped up and for a second I thought he was going to be fine, and therefore so was I. He took a couple of steps and then his face melted into tears. At the same moment, I could feel tears coming to my own eyes. I had to look away from him to keep them from spilling over. He was just devastated and SO embarrassed. I put my arm around him (Tabitha was in the other, otherwise I would have scooped him up and carried him away so he didn't have to cry in front of his friends). I told him that sometimes things like that happen when you're running fast and playing really well. I told him that it happens to the pro's all the time (does it? I don't know, but I would have told him ANYTHING to make him feel better). Brandon told him that the best thing to do is go out there and score a goal on the other team to show that it didn't bother him. It took Daxton a couple of minutes to calm down. His team really needed him to recover because they were down a couple of players. He sucked it up, and he went out there like a champ.

I have never experienced my child's pain with such intensity before. I am still surprisingly emotional about it, and unfortunately this is probably not the last time I will feel their pain. I am so proud of my Daxton and I love him so much. He is an amazing little boy with the most adorable little freckles and tender spirit.